Transparency of Marriage in Their Own Words
This is part 1 and part 2. If you are not watching Red Table Talk, do not miss the next episode. I enjoyed Part 1 and had to tune in for Part 2.
Part 1 shows there are twists and turns to every relationship. The irony of Will wanting to meet Jada but seeing his first wife and marrying her instead. The start of Will and Jada’s relationship was after his divorce. One thing I noticed was she gave up her life in Baltimore to be with him. Also, she assumed the role of a stepmother without any preparation. When she found out she was pregnant, a wedding was planned and she was not 100% on board with the idea. Their new lives moved very quickly to living as husband and wife with a child. There was no time in between to exhale. It was interesting that Will reached out to Jada after his divorce papers were signed. After my divorce, I realized taking time for myself was overlooked. He was convinced that he needed to be with her based on their chance meeting. It made me wonder if he checked out of his previous marriage which in turn led to its demise. Despite, overcoming a lot of hurdles it was clear divorce was not an option. This episode made me wonder if we get a second chance to find the person we are meant to be with forever?
As a divorcee, I realized it took me almost 20 years to know and understand what I need. This episode covers a few topics that resonated with me on so many levels. Yes, it was clear from the conversation their decisions are relevant to their lives and what is necessary for their family. Marriage is not a one size fits all. The one thing that really sticks is the fact that marriage is truly a partnership. A mutual partnership that means each person has a right to have their needs met. Also, in a partnership being able to communicate with your partner on everything is necessary. No secrets or judgments. Jada’s 40th birthday was an awakening on finding herself and what was important for her outside of being a wife and mother. I love the fact that Will recognized she needed to find her happy. Do we take the time to think about these things before marriage?
Some of the things I learned after watching part 1 and part 2. What makes a marriage work? There is no formula or secret recipe. I feel entering the institution with the right intentions is critical and not being in love with the idea of marriage. I think having relevant examples helps to frame an understanding of what is expected. If only I could rewind the clock and spend enough time living life. The most important lesson for me is to bring your authentic self and do not bring an imposter. Also, the ability to give a partner space to enjoy what they are passionate about even the interest is not common. No two marriages are the same. What works in one home may not apply in someone else’s home.
If you find someone who encourages you to be your best self, this is a blessing. Did you miss when they said they talk about everything? A partner to share the good, the bad and the ugly are golden. This space should be for making one another better not for the purpose of judgment or criticism. The ability to accept that as partners we are imperfectly perfect is an added bonus. Last but not least, mutual respect for one another is priceless.