This Is Us Season 3 Episode 17 “Randall & Beth” Relationship Dynamics

Episode 16

After I watched Episode 16, I was on pins and needles about the future for Beth and Randall. The episode ended with a heated conversation between Beth and Randall. I know Randall will think twice about leaving another insensitive voicemail.

Episode 17

This week’s episode started with Beth telling Randall how she felt over the course of their relationship from the beginning. I had no idea they attended the same college and started dating in college. Their first date ended abruptly because Randall overdid it with his planning. I felt he never stopped to figure out what Beth liked or what was a perfect date for her. When Beth ended the date she clearly told Randall to never call her again because he was too much. Obviously, he did call again. His relationship with his mother really bothered Beth to some extent, especially how much he shared with her. I thought this was a bit over the top for him to share so much detail with his mother and want to include his mother on his dates with Beth.

Randall’s passion and love spread to everyone in his life. She obviously learned to love that part of him. The promise Beth asked of Randall is that they not get lost in the midst of married life. A few things were apparent early on before the accepted proposal, Beth was fine being in their seven-year relationship and in no hurry to be married. I feel she was still trying to find herself. Beth also had an issue with Randall’s mother being a third wheel. Randall invited her along like it was normal.
After countless proposals, Beth finally accepted.

Compromise or No?

After, twenty years of marriage, Beth finally realized her dream of teaching dance. There is a scene in which Beth and Randall are sitting at the kitchen table munching on nachos while Tess slept. Beth talks about looking forward to returning to work and Randall reassures her they will work it out. This is when Beth proceeds to compare both of them to chips. She eventually makes it clear only the crumbs are left. Randall was a bit annoyed as he thought Beth was saying she is only left with crumbs. Beth quickly redirected the conversation for them to get a full night’s sleep. I think the reality of being a wife and mother with a career was starting to sink in for Beth.

Marriage

This episode highlighted relevant topics for marriage. Can compromise exist in marriage? Are dreams deferred while married? How often should you check in with your spouse on goals? This episode was a realistic depiction of marriage and its challenges. Marriage is difficult when two people come together with different life goals. Before Beth and Randall were married, Beth was assertive in what she needed. After getting married, she put herself on hold to support Randall’s next brainstorm. Randall brought a lot of extra and while Beth appeared fine supporting him I think she became resentful. The end of this episode has me thinking they may take some time apart.

This episode is a clear indicator of the communication that is lacking before saying I do. Vows are words but the actions that follow set the tone for the institution.