Happy Is My Story!
What is Happy? The best part of the Wendy Williams show is her HOT TOPICS SEGMENT. On Monday, she covers all the big headlines in pop culture from the weekend. Well if you’re like me you either heard or, at least, saw Mariah Carey’s 35 carat engagement ring!!!! I believe the ring is valued at well over $7 million (hold it, pausing to count how I could invest that amount of money, I digress). If you missed the ring of all celebrity rings I have shared below. Now let’s get pass the size and value of her new BLING!
I am all for women finding love again and being happy after going through a separation and divorce. However, I wrestle with how you can honestly celebrate an engagement if you’re both still married. It made me pause to say HOLD UP!!!
After Wendy divulged the fact both she and her boyfriend are still married her next comment made me scratch my head. She said I know there’s a race to be happy before your EX……..
I obviously missed this memo. This year marks 3 years since my divorce papers were received in the mail. Personally, I was so elated to close those chapters in my life I never thought twice about what my EX was doing or planning to do. I had far too much planning of my own to care about rather than any race with the EX.
Now I will admit to a LOT of GROWTH and DEVELOPMENT from my separation to officially being DIVORCED! As they say, hindsight is 20/20, I would stand in lines to rewind and rewrite some of my decisions. The only race you should be in while divorcing is putting 100% of your FOCUS on YOURSELF. I uncovered some tough lessons about myself, others and relationships along the way. While I cannot change others I learned I had to change my behavior and choices to be HAPPY. The one piece of advice I can offer up is to spend time finding YOUR HAPPY. In the past six years, I went from being separated to officially divorced, I learned a ton of invaluable LESSONS. We’re all HUMAN and we will make mistakes. The key to learning is not repeating the same mistakes.
FIVE THINGS I LEARNED
- Spend at least a YEAR carving out what you NEED for YOUR HAPPY. Do not rush into another relationship! When the timing is right all of these things will fall into place.
- Put your HOUSE in order in terms of your career, finances, create a timeline of short term and long term goals for yourself and your child(ren).
- Create a strong SUPPORT network of like-minded friends. There will be times when you need a break, a time to vent and a reason to get away for some adult fun.
- Find what you LIKE, LOVE and are PASSIONATE about and DO IT!
- Remember your MENTAL and PHYSICAL well-being is determined by your behavior and the choices you make. Each day should be centered on YOUR HAPPY!