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JenOni

Nov 6, 2014

Single Mom Chronicles-Why I Smile? : Life Lessons

 

phonto (32)

 

 

Last week someone told me my smile made their day and not this was not a significant other! Yes, I smiled. We all have a reason to smile, right? Well I know I do despite the good, the bad and the ugly.

In five months my life has felt like a 360 of great moments. A divorce, new job with a nonprofit organization, a new home and peace of mind. If I look back on the past four years, there is too much to catch up on in one post. I have started to write a book to chronicle as much as I need to share with the public. When we get married I guess the thought is it will last forever or as the words “until death do us part”. This is until the reality of the world sets in. No one can teach you how to handle being an adult let alone sharing your life with another adult, it is a challenging and complicated world at times.    Can you prepare for marriage?   Absolutely, if you have carved out a secure life for yourself.     You should definitely navigate the world through your eyes before you decide to settle down with another person.    From this I mean travel, enjoy and indulge yourself, pursue your interests and hobbies, determine your career interests, education goals and become FINANCIALLY SECURE(save, save, save AND INVEST)!     I feel settling down with another person should leave no regrets on what you could’ve, should’ve, and would’ve done.     From day one of planning a life with another person, communicate what you want and what you need so there are no surprises on either side!!!!    This is advice works for any and all relationships.      If you cannot articulate your desires or needs how will others ever know?   Lesson learned, check!   Fast forward to a new job after being unemployed for 2 years, working at a new job for 3 years.    It is amazing how you can become so complacent with the norm.      You wake up every morning, get ready, and drive to work, sit at a desk and wonder why I am here?    Yes, earning an income is important but what happens when you feel like you’re not working to your full potential?   What happens when the company you work for does not value its employees? What happens when the leadership does not value its employees? What happens when you start to dread driving to work each morning? And checking your watch every hour?    All of these are signs it is time to EXIT and look for opportunities that value you as an individual and employee!    I am now working for a nonprofit organization in a leadership role.     If anyone told me 4 years ago that I would be here my inner voice would have whispered yeah right!!!!! I am so glad that I turned off that inner voice and took a LEAP of FAITH to take an opportunity that was offered based on someone seeing my value and worth.    It is so easy to become conditioned to what others think rather than what you know is your FULL POTENTIAL!!!!    I will say that it is important to KNOW YOUR WORTH AND VALUE and never underestimate your capabilities to SOAR!     The LESSON LEARNED here is it only takes one person to BELIEVE in your VALUE and provide the capacity for you to develop professionally.    I am so fortunate to have this opportunity and I look forward to my future growth and development both personally and professionally.

When my kids wanted to drive pass our old house I was thinking wow I am so over my past life. The house represents such a sore spot for me and it felt so cold driving into the development. However I had to realize that for children any transition is difficult for them and no matter how much time passes it will be a part of them. When we divorce one another children stay attached to their previous life.   I thought by now the house was sold and occupied with a new family.   I’m not sure if it helped but at least it was a little bit of closure for them I think??     Well fast forward of living in my childhood home for the past 4 years with two kids and we are now in our new home in a new neighborhood.  LESSON LEARNED:  CHANGE FEELS GREAT!   The best part for me is having my own bedroom with my very own bathroom, sometimes it’s the little things!!! That matter!!!

This is my STORY!!! And Yes, I will continue to SMILE in spite of the PAST and continue to be HOPEFUL for the FUTURE!!!!

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: Single Mom Chronicles Tagged With: #future, #newhome, #newjob, divorce, Kids

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