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JenOni

Dec 19, 2012

Parenting: Should We Reward Our Kids for Academics?

 

The title of this post stemmed from a discussion that started on Facebook when a friend posted  her 11yo wanted the new Lebron sneakers for a great report card.    My friend had no intention of buying such an expensive pair of sneakers.   Nonetheless, she was interested in what her FB friends had to say.  I chimed in and suggested she search the internet for a discount site to buy the sneakers.   Another FB friend’s post was against rewarding children with high price tag items for what is expected of them.   Whenever I hear about students excelling academically it’s exciting news.    I love to hear stories of students working hard in school and receiving the grades that highlight their achievements.

When I was in grade school, high school and college it was my parents’ expectation that I do well.    As a student I always managed to do my best and achieve great results.   I remember my parents giving me words of encouragement but there was not a time when I received a material item for doing well in school.   I am a proponent of children earning material items versus getting without merit.   My dilemma:  does this same principle apply when it comes to academic achievements?   This is a tough one for me.

My tween and I battle all the time over schoolwork and tests.    He has the rationale that as long as I get a C it is acceptable.   Also he has a tendency to compare himself to other classmates especially if they are scoring below his grades.   It is almost comforting for him to know that some classmates are doing worst therefore he must be the star student.   No matter how many talks we have on being conscientious and putting more effort into his work he still manages to convince himself that average is acceptable.    I am relentless on instilling in my tween the long term affects his grades will have on high school and college.   It is a tough battle but I will continue to plug away at him.

When a student shows academic achievement I think there should be a celebration as a  way of acknowledging meeting goals.  I think as long as parents set boundaries there is no room for children to misinterpret the intention.    A dinner night out at their favorite restaurant is a good idea.  I feel all academic achievements should be celebrated verbally and creatively so the child continues to be encouraged.

Do you reward your kids for academics?  If so, how?

Filed Under: Uncategorized Tagged With: academics, rewards, tweens

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